I have functioned with ADD my entire life, but only recently was actually diagnosed with it. I don’t even think it was considered a real medical issue until I was probably in my teens or at least it wasn’t diagnosed as often. And, as a child, I was only taken to the doctor if I was dying.
I’ve never been able to sit down and watch TV like other people do and finishing any task is almost impossible for me. I do almost everything in my life in short five minute bursts. I read four to five books at a time. I work on seven to ten projects at a time. Now that I have started taking medication, I am able to focus for longer periods, but still not a full hour eight hour day. Or much beyond four hours if I’m honest.
I constantly getting distracted when I’m doing something. That’s usually when a big idea hits me or I remember that the oven is on. My husband lovingly calls me a squirrel. Because I have been known to point them out mid-conversation much like the dog in that cartoon movie.
Before trying medication, I tried many other ways to gain more focus in my life including vitamins, mindful breathing and meditation. Meditation is basically shoved down my throat constantly via friends, the internet and doctors. Let me assure you, I am the worst meditator that has ever existed.
I am not a quitter and I never have been with the exception of my prior marriages. So I continuously try to do this and never get any better. I have tried guided meditation. I have tried it with my eyes open and I have tried it with my eyes closed. I’ve tried it laying down and I have tried it sitting up. I am starting to think I am the one person in the world that absolutely cannot do this.
So tonight, while you are in a place of zen, think about me over here giving it a good solid try for the four millionth time. Maybe your consciousness can reach out and bitch slap mine into submission.